He did want to lose her. So he tried his best to do whatever it took to make their meeting; like the dream of holding each other come true. He was truly in love. Fell so hard for her. Like the moments when they don’t speak; the loneliness of being is too much for him to take. He would rather die for her love than live for prosperity. A woman whom he has yet to touch with his own flesh. A woman whose beauty was deeper than anything he has ever witnessed in his forty years. He couldn’t help himself, her words of the future she saw for them; kept him going through his daily struggles with life.
Love. A word so powerful and delicate.
All I want is to be able to hold her and let her hear the voices of emotions she evokes that echo from deep within my heart. Her smile that captivates me from her photographs; the only thing that I have as evidence of her existing outside of the phone calls and text messages; that are filled with indescribable emotions. The music that she fills in my heart. The pleasures of a world so perfect with the union of our hearts. She is so far away and yet at times feels as if she is right here next to me. Letting me know that all will be okay in due time. Letting me know that love is powerful and that nothing can take away what we have. If only I wasn’t so prone to destroy what is good. If only I could be strong enough to know that GOD really does hear my prayers, her prayers are the reflections of my prayers.
It is almost Christmas and I feel pieces of my heart slowly breaking away. Funny she’s no further now than she was yesterday, but I feel as if she is a million miles away. Maybe it was just self-doubt about others out there seeking to get her attention that keeps me feeling so sad. Even though she tells me how much she loves me. I try not to doubt her love, but it is those others who might get her attention because they have the luxury of being in her presence, blessed with the captive smile that she gives to the world. Though I know her heart [as I am told] belongs to me. Enchanted I am by her that my soul is found and lost all at once. So every day I get on my knees with hands raised towards heaven begging GOD and His Holy Son to hear my prayers. To make me a better man so that I can do right by her. To one day honor him with our love in Holy Matrimony.
Wondering if he hears my prayers. Trying my best not to sound like I am asking for favors. But for a sign showing that he hears my cries. How I am nothing more than just a child, only a vessel in his arms needing to feel his grace and to grant me this beautiful woman that he has placed in my life now, as my wife in this life and in the next. I feel like this is all a dream and that I will wake soon to realize that. I pray that is not the case. For if this is a dream; let me sleep for eternity.
Like the sun, that rises and sets. She is the vision that fills my day. Giving way to the moon that brings the dreams of what can be if we believe that love knows no bounds on this LOVE JOURNEY. I’m ready for love. Maybe you may be the lady, lady love
(To be continued)